HELLO AND GOODBYE...SORTA

Hello all you fiends and fiendettes, I have some very cool personal news. I was at Shopko last week, and we walked down the bathroom frillies aisle. Now most men don't even know this aisle exists. I was one of them, but I was looking for something and by Odin's good eye, I had to have it. Not to buy you silly dilly, just to use. I found a scale, not for cars or cows, but for people. So low and high I searched. In the automotive section, in ladies lingerie (now I didn't actually hope to find it there, I just wanted to be around the lace and satin....I"M KIDDING!!!!!!!!) and than the toy section. Nope didn't find the scale there at all...but I did find a very cool singing deer head (that Season refuses to let me purchase:( ). So Season finally askes me "What the hell ARE you looking for?", now those may have not been her exact words, but damnit it's funnier this way. So I tell her I need to see a scale, so she starts singing "DO RE MI FA SO LA TI DO", and than starts giggling. I was unamused. She than takes me by the hand, and walks me down this aisle. Did you know that toilet seat covers come in wide array of colors? Or that you can buy porcelain toothbrush holders that can match a plastic garbage can, and a plastic soapdish? Also did you know that there IS a difference between a shower curtain AND a shower liner? Well I do now. Because that was where the scale was, in the bathroom frillie aisle. So Yup, I grabbed a scale ( a cheap one just in case it broke and I actually had to buy it). I was hoping for it to lie to me. Last time I jumped on a scale, I was 356 lbs. Yes I was officially no longer just fluffy, I was damn near chunky monkey. So I stood on the scale. It went around and around and than it slowed down and stopped. It didn't keep going like an airplane propeller. It actually stoopped. It kept hopping from 219 lbs to 227 lbs. So I avereaged it out. I'm as close to 224 as I can be right now. I'm actually aiming for 200 lbs, and I'll be as happy as a prostitute and a gyno convention. Oh and good bye for a little bit, sorta. We're gonna be getting dial up so the updates will be a little more spread out for a little bit. As in every other or so day. Just to let y'all know. Ok Like some belly buttons, I'm outtie.
Jose

ONE OF THE FUNNIEST THINGS I'VE READ IN A LONG TIME

http://www.deadpan.net/housewife/2005/08/02/may-the-force-be-with-you/
Good lord, and I thought I was a SW junkie...LOL
Jose

A RECENT NOTE LEFT FOR ME

I love you. I can hardly wait for work to be over tonight so I can see you. I miss your smile when you're not here, but when I close my eyes I can see it. And then I smile.
wow, I'm all mushy in notes. weird
Love you
your wife

I love you too,
Jose

INTRODUCING SEASON

LOL...Season will on occasion be joining me on here. To add clarity and sometimes a whole lot of humor. And I guess there might even be an occasion when she will fly solo to tell you stories, anecdotes and yes even the embarrising tale once in a while. So say "HI" to her. Cuz if you don't...I'll have to put the pic of my thonged ass on here....than you'll be sorry!!!!!
jose

THE STORY OF THE NETHER GARMENTS or HOW MY UNDERWEAR SELECTION CHANGES OVER NIGHT

Ob-la-di, ob-la-da life goes on - bra... For some reason when I sat down today I had that damn song run thru my feeble brain, and since I didn't know the lyrics, I looked them up. So when it got to the line up there, I said hehehe "he said bra". Which made me remember that over the last month or so, Season and I have umm...expanded our nether region garments. It helps when the person you're with makes you feel special (no not the short bus kinda special, I mean c'mon here, I'm trying to be honest and romantic) that it also makes you feel beautiful/handsome. So needless to say we have started to let each other pick out lower coverings for each other. Me being the more shy and conservative have picked out some elegant yet tasteful garments for her. Now she on the other hand, well let me just tell you the whole story....

Over the weekend we stopped at K-Mart to shop because K-Mart still has some awesome deals. Well we were looking at the Led Zeppelin

and the Guns N Roses

lounge pants. I than remembered that I didn't do laundry...aka no clean bottom garbs, so I said I need to purchase some...thus giving me another laundry reprieve. So I was going to pick out my usual very conservative boxer briefs but alas Season would say "NAY, I forbid thee to PURCHASE SAID PRIVATE FINERY!!" Who knew she could talk like a Norse God? So anyway, she stands there like the statue of liberty holding up a package like it was her torch and her hand outstretched palm open saying is a thunderous tone "WRECTHED MAN, I NEED GOLD TO BRIBE THE KEEPERS OF THIS TRADING POST, SO THAT I MAY LEAVE HERE WITH MY NEW FOUND TREASURE!!!!!" There was a really scary gleam in her eye. So I gave her my wallet and what I can only describe as the most horrifying sound I ever heard she made this gutteral scream, (which I later found out was her hunt/kil victory scream). So when we got home, I was forced upstairs by sword point (where and when she got a sword is still a mystery to me) as she forced me to disrobe. Making lewd and suggestive comments the whole time. I was scared, but I love her so I did was I was told. Than she took her booty (you know what she got at the store...perverts) and tore open the package like Golem tearing into a fish, and threw an item at me. I caught it and she in a Xena "AIAIAIAIAIAIAIAIAIAIAIAIAIAIAI" scream said put them on. Much to my horror and dismay she had bought man thongs. She wanted me to put on a thong. I gulped in the sheer horror of being so, dare I say the word?, exposed. But my love for her is great, that and the fact that she also had a crossbow pointed at me (where the hell she keeps her armory is still a mystery to me). So I did. Well they weren't that bad, but the evil glimmer in her eye....

OW!! OW!! STOP HITTING ME!! DAMNIT THAT HURTS!! NO BITING NOOOO BIIIITING!! HEY OW OW OW DON'T PULL ON THAT!! STOP PULLING MY HAIR!!!!!!!!

Ok, Season here to set the story straight. I can't believe the pack of lies he's spouting. I THOUGHT this was called the "Confessional" and would then have truth, but obviously I was grievously mistaken. "Oh lie to me Pinicchio, lie to me!!!"

So, yes, I too hate doing laundry, so I was going to purchase some new underwear and I truly was in need of new bras. Now, normally I get panties and bras similar to these. Hey, they're underwear, I wasn't seeing anyone, so what difference did it make? They were comfortable dammit! Well, obviously, they weren't sexy enough for him. So, I told him, "fine, go ahead, pick something out." I just gave him a few groundrules...nothing pink, no jewelry crap on it, no cutesy sayings (I'm too old for that shit thank you very much). I think he wandered around in the intimate apparel section for at least an hour, stopping at the flimsiest, filmiest, and yes, sometimes trashiest stuff they had there. I just rolled my eyes and walked away. The worst part was the little old lady in the section giving me looks that screamed "TRAMP!!" And the mother with her 3 young children who looked at me with sympathy. She whispered, "oh, one of those huh?" I looked down and nodded. "I share your pain," she replied.

So, after much fondling of lace and netting, drooling the entire time, he chose a variety of colors of these bras and these...thongs! Oh my dear Lord, he's making me wear a thong. Worse yet, I'm paying for these things! Ok, I can deal, again, they're going to be under my clothing and I can always wear the old panties/bra when I go to the doctor right?!? But then....he heads over to a different section. Then I knew I was in trouble. Yep, the trashy section, the one with the matching sets. The ones with chains, the ones that look like the stuff white trash girls Madonna-wannabes in the '80s wore. And he picks out...this (gasps) only this picture doesn't have the leather laces on it, so yes...the reality is worse. Give me strength! The strings on the thongs don't go up my butt as badly as I thought, I'm used to them now. Plus, since it's over 90 degrees, less fabric is cooler, so I can handle it.

Now, in retaliation, I purchased these mesh trunks for him, which he likes because he says they breathe more than the standard cotton ones he normally gets. Plus, they make his butt look AWESOME!! *evil grin* A few weeks later, he came home from Wal*mart all upset because, since I was wearing thongs for him, he thought it would be nice to wear thongs for me. But, they only had string bikinis. Well, when we were out of town, we DID find some thongs for him, which he picked out by the way. He just is too embarrassed to buy them if a female cashier is working. So, that's my job. The first set of thongs are nice, but they don't fit him that comfortably (see, as a woman I'm worried about his comfort). The most recent set, again his idea thank you very much, are much more comfortable for him. Of course, the minute we walk in the door with the new underwear, he just has to go on the runway, humming "I'm too sexy for my shirt, too sexy for my shirt, so sexy it hurts...", and struts around the apartment, posing and acting all come-hither.

"HONEY I GOT YOU A DOUBLE HOT FUDGE CHOCOLATE SUNDAE!!!!!"

Wow and good frikken lord, I never thought she would leave the keyboard. Truth told, Season and I did go shopping for intimate apparel, and we did pick out the things you have seen in the links. But we did it together. Not for any other reason than the way we see each other, and the way we want each other to feel. You see she makes me feel handsome, and she tells me that I make her feel beautiful, and when we are around each other, we make each other feel sexy. So we did the underwear thing, as a way of letting each other know how, we see each other. Yeah, it sometimes gets a bit embarrising, but were in this together. As a couple. as a partnership and a very soon to be newlyweds. This was always about love and trust. Yeah there are times when doubts and fears rear their ugly heads, but we work through them. There are times when we doubt the way we look, but we look into each others eyes, and we can see how we look at each other, and how that makes us feel. So I hope this little retelling and truth saying was both fun and enjoyable. But it really was just us having some fun with truths mixed in....until next time I remain

Jose...and she remains

Season

TOO BORED TO WRITE

La la la la la la la la la la. me me me me me me me me me me me. Nothing to say today. So I' thought to do nuffin but waste some time. Ok I'm done.

Jose

I GOT A WEDDING TO GO TO

and it's not mine...well not yet. My step brother is getting married next Saturday. Season and I are going. Mostly out of obligation on my part. I really don't want to, the only real plus, is I'm going to XF's house to fill out my application for the boys home. Season get's to meet both XF and PW (Police woman who also happens to be his fiance'). They have been great friends, although sometimes XF gets a little clingy. But if it helps us move down (with a job for me) than I'll deal with it. There's a 50/50% chance that i'll even be moving back into my old apartment. Which will be nice. It wasn't much, but it was a nice place for me. Also, that way I don't have to stay with the 'rents. And...well it would be our place. When I left I told myself the only way I'll go back is if it's with all my dreams next to me. Well I'm coming back with more than just my dreams, I'm coming back with my soul and with my (by than) wife. Ok talk to you soon.

jose

WELL WELL WELL...NEW UPDATES

Hello again all you crazy cats, I just got off the phone with XF (he's a friend from the old stomping grounds, who works at the boys home I used to work at)...and he said there's a pretty good chance I can get my old job back...in a different department. Yay me...and boo me. You see emotionally it was a taxing job. The money and OT (overtime) were good. But to the soul it was draining. But that was also before I had Season. I know that no job is ever easy. But I also know with her by my side, nothing is impossible. So I gotta call his boss tomorrow and hopefully all will go good. I'll let you know what happens.