GREG

Well a few weeks back my wife and I were at a Speedway, and an old grade school friend was there. Greg noticed me, and said hi. Well as per my ususal self, I said hi back, introduced my wife, and he explained how we knew each other. After a few pleasentries, I said we had to go and it was really nice to see him again. When we were driving away, my wife asked me why I never mentioned him before. I told her because Greg was a good guy, and during my high school era, I wanted a "cool world," and Greg was anything but cool. He was a bonafide dork/geek. You see the grade school we attended was a private catholic school. I basically went to school with the same 25 or so kids for 8 years. We were all in the same class, so we attended all the same classes. From 9:00 AM till 3:30 PM, the same kids and the same classes for 8 years. Yeah there were the cool kids and the dorks, but for some reason we all got along pretty well. The cliques came into play in the 7th and 8th years, but before that, well it was for the most part a pretty level playing field. Well, than I was thrown into a world I never new. I went to a public school for the second time in my life...but I guess kindergarten doesn't really count. I was floored by the different people. I was floored by the multitude of people. I just left a school where all were basically equal, and I realized something for the for first time. I was a dork. I was the geek. I was the nerd. And unlike now, where I let my freak flag fly, back then I didn't. I was going to do anything it took to be in a cool circle. Yet oddly enough, I still surrounded myself with the freaks, geeks and nerds. It took me 4 years to realize the only person I had to be was myself so in my 5th year I was just that. But before that...well I was whatever you wanted me to be. Was I a class clown? Yup. Was I a smart ass? Absolutely. Was I smart? Yeah, but I never let it show...ever. Well Greg was different than me. He was never ashamed of what he was. Yes he was a comic geek, and even brought them to school. Was he smart? Absolutely! But he worked hard at it. He wasn't ashamed to be himself, unlike me. Again I wanted it all...and in the end? Well I made a few good friends, and I made one best friend (even though we don't talk or hang out as much as we used to) he still remains an anchor in my world. SO yeah, I sorta got what I wanted. I had a lot of people to hang with. I was pretty much allowed in most circles. But...Greg who was always just himself, had made some very strong friendships (I had the privelage to be reminded of that by his best friend), and works with "special" kids. So this geek, has made a pretty wonderful thing out of his life, simply by being himself. Me on the other hand, is starting to make a life. I started at ground level, when I met the woman who I fell in love with, and less than a year later would be my girlfriend, and a year after that would become my wife. I'm finally starting to be myself...for better or worse. What can I say I was a late bloomer. But I wouldn't change it for anything. Rascal Flatts has a song with the most perfect lyrics to end this entry with...

Every long lost dream led me to where you are
Others who broke my heart they were like northern stars
Pointing me on my way into your loving arms
This much I know is true
That God blessed the broken road
That led me straight to you

So there ya have it. The fact that I dwell on things way too much. So yeah life goes on. The next song starts when it starts. You can't unturn a page, and you can't change the past. But you can learn from it, and with my past I'm doing a lot of learning.

CAN'T SLEEP

Well it's 3:47 AM. I have watched part of 3 shows on showtime. My wife and I had some alone time, and we both fell asleep. Less than an hour later I woke up. I have been up for two hours and 17 minutes. I really want to sleep, but as of now the sandman eludes my cries for help. Just wanted to share. This song is....