HELLO AND GOODBYE...SORTA

Hello all you fiends and fiendettes, I have some very cool personal news. I was at Shopko last week, and we walked down the bathroom frillies aisle. Now most men don't even know this aisle exists. I was one of them, but I was looking for something and by Odin's good eye, I had to have it. Not to buy you silly dilly, just to use. I found a scale, not for cars or cows, but for people. So low and high I searched. In the automotive section, in ladies lingerie (now I didn't actually hope to find it there, I just wanted to be around the lace and satin....I"M KIDDING!!!!!!!!) and than the toy section. Nope didn't find the scale there at all...but I did find a very cool singing deer head (that Season refuses to let me purchase:( ). So Season finally askes me "What the hell ARE you looking for?", now those may have not been her exact words, but damnit it's funnier this way. So I tell her I need to see a scale, so she starts singing "DO RE MI FA SO LA TI DO", and than starts giggling. I was unamused. She than takes me by the hand, and walks me down this aisle. Did you know that toilet seat covers come in wide array of colors? Or that you can buy porcelain toothbrush holders that can match a plastic garbage can, and a plastic soapdish? Also did you know that there IS a difference between a shower curtain AND a shower liner? Well I do now. Because that was where the scale was, in the bathroom frillie aisle. So Yup, I grabbed a scale ( a cheap one just in case it broke and I actually had to buy it). I was hoping for it to lie to me. Last time I jumped on a scale, I was 356 lbs. Yes I was officially no longer just fluffy, I was damn near chunky monkey. So I stood on the scale. It went around and around and than it slowed down and stopped. It didn't keep going like an airplane propeller. It actually stoopped. It kept hopping from 219 lbs to 227 lbs. So I avereaged it out. I'm as close to 224 as I can be right now. I'm actually aiming for 200 lbs, and I'll be as happy as a prostitute and a gyno convention. Oh and good bye for a little bit, sorta. We're gonna be getting dial up so the updates will be a little more spread out for a little bit. As in every other or so day. Just to let y'all know. Ok Like some belly buttons, I'm outtie.
Jose