LASSIE

Over Christmas, Season and I learned something about our downstairs neighbors. I'm pretty sure it's something that they probably don't want us to know, but we now know anyways.

So what is it you ask? Well let me tell you.

1. They like to have sex.

Which isn't a bad thing. I mean who doesn't like to have sex?

2. When they do, she's either trying out for porn, or doing her best "Lassie" impersonation from 80's classic guy movie PORKY'S.

Just in case you don't know what I am talking about...I've included this



3. The headboard banging against the wall doesn't last very long.

Which can't be a good thing can it?

Of course the thing that cracks me up the most is that these "events" last for less than 3 minutes. What makes it even funnier is that afterwards we can hear her telling him how great he was.

I thought about dropping off an envelope marked "For Her Pleasure," and including a Viagra flyer in their mailbox for christmas...but then I thought

"Nahhhhh, that would just be tacky."

But it sure would have been funny.